Ever Since.

Ever since that one meeting, things haven't been the same. Ever since that one exchange of smiles and a few glances, things haven't been the same. Ever since that one sharing of meal together, things haven't been the same. Ever since that one ride together, things haven't been the same. Ever since the shedding of tears and wiping them off, things haven't been the same. Ever since that insight of faith, things haven't been the same. Ever since the ever since, nothing have been the same. Her scars had grown deeper now, and her heart pounded harder than ever, her bones were weaker and her skin all pale. She didn't seem to care though, she was lost in the ever since. The ever since, that made her forget about the person she was. The ever since that took her everything. The only thing it left in her, was her. The her she had to search for, the her she had been waiting for to come out of the dark depths of distress and into release. What was left of her was lost in the woods where the night spooked and the day never arose. Where the thorns grew and grew and grew. Where it was long elapsed how a flower blooms. The only thing she could pour out was gloom. However, she never wanted this. She never wanted to lose herself, she wanted change, but not the change the 'ever since' had brought her…

And then one terrifying night, her eyes illuminated. She stared at the sky blankly, feeling the warmth of radiance in her eyes. The warmth that travelled into her bones and to her heart. The warmth that she needed to find her. The feeling of yearning and waiting was now seeming to get past. The slug like thorns tied around her feet, grew sturdier and harsher. The night went creepier, the day hid behind the clouds with terror. She watched the sky again, rather with a sense of deceit. The sense of betrayal. But the warmth had filled her eyes, and it was still there. So she played her chances and gave it a try. With the weapons of courage and sanguinity, she cuts the thorns into pieces and stands up for the first time. With her one step forward, the ever since plays itself in sequence. She's taken back once again, the sequence screams and screeches its beauty into her eyes and mind. But she's up and about now, first step taken towards the finding of her. She could let the ever since take control yet she takes a good look at the scars, the catastrophic memories, the calamity the ever since had caused, and she looks beyond the layered, over grown trees of mourning, and finds the day coming out once more. And this is when she comprehends, it's not the day crushing the creepy night, it's not the light illuminating her eyes, it’s not the warmth she felt earlier. It's her. The her she had lost, is found now.